July 4, 2021

June book club + wailing walls

Last week started with Monday morning book club at Kirbyville Farm Market. June's book Educated won high marks from everyone. Some said it's been the best one so far! 


I certainly enjoyed reading it again. It's a memoir but reads like a story, and is hard to put down once you get started.

Kaleigh picked The Last Green Valley for our next book. It's a WWII historical fiction novel, right down my alley. I started reading this weekend and so far, I'm hooked!



On the job front, things have been going much the same. I finally finished training in the IV room last week, and managed to do stats on my own a few days. According to what I've heard, some people do fine with training until they get to stats, then break down under the pressure. It can definitely be stressful, but I think I might end up liking it best. Intensity doesn't bother me and there's always someone to help if you're drowning. Also, we get to work with some interesting drugs. We do lots of meds for the pediatric cancer center, and all three vaccines (Pfizer, Moderna, Johnson & Johnson) came through on different days last week. I also made IV's for a gift of life donor and a transplant patient. 

I've been at LVHN almost 6 months, which is the time I vowed to give myself to see if things got better. Some things are better now that I'm in the IV room, but there's still an underlying discontent and unhappiness. I have been exploring other opportunities, but I'm reluctant to switch jobs again and the unknown scares me tremendously. What if I dislike the next place just as much as this one? I would've been better off staying where I am. I actually feel paralyzed by my indecision and unhappiness with my current situation. It's affected my mood and zeal for life, and I can't seem to dig myself out of this hole.

In Sue Monk Kidd's The Secret Life of Bees, May, one of the main characters, suffers from depression and is overly sensitive to the world's sadness. Her sisters constructed a "wailing wall" like the one in Jerusalem, and when May is feeling sad, she writes down what is bothering her and sticks the notes in the wall. 



May's wailing wall spoke deeply to me, and ever since I read this book, I've wanted to make my own. Somehow I think I'd find it therapeutic. Maybe one of these days I'll gather up the energy to get started! 

5 comments:

  1. I think you are so brave to say it how you feel! And now I want to read The Secret Lives of Bees. Reading Educated once, was enough for me.

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  2. I agree you are Brave! Loved Educated! And I really want to read the other 2 books you talked about too!

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  3. Tell me more about having book club at a farmers market! That sounds so picturesque! And I love too, how you have been able to put your unhappiness out there; it’s hard to own our own sadness sometimes! And then to try to figure out if we need wisdom to know what to change or serenity to accept! Hang in there! You have a huge support group behind you! 💪🏼

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    1. Kirbyville is an indoor farmer's market in an old (redone) barn. There's a bakery/coffee shop where we get yummy coffee, tea, or whatever suits us! It's a great place for book club!

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  4. I sure loved the “Last Green Valley”!!

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