pros and cons

In my last post I mentioned feeling discontented with my job and experiencing nostalgia for teaching. It caught me by surprise because I thought I had finally put that to rest and no longer missed teaching. Sometimes I wonder why I can't be more settled with where I'm at in life. I know I sound unstable and wishy-washy. I'd like to be more steady and anchored, but don't believe in trying to be something I'm not. Being fake is too exhausting. At 35 years old, I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up! Part of me would like to settle down and stick with one thing, but the other part of me sees so many opportunities and begins to question if I want to stay in the same place. I'm also realizing how quickly time moves on and how soon we age. Am I using my time in the best way possible, or will I look back in 20 years and say "I should have taken that opportunity!"? This quote has been an inspiration to me many times, although I don't know exactly what it means for me.

What are the bowlines keeping me in the safe harbor? Could the safe harbor actually be the place I should stay? So many conflicting thoughts leave me feeling a little topsy-turvy. In an attempt to make sense of it all, I decided to make a list of pros and cons of being a teacher versus pros and cons of my current job. It helped to see it spelled out, but didn't completely clear it up. Here's a condensed version of that list. The items are not listed in order of importance.

Teaching: Pros

• Challenging and rewarding
• Involvement with church people, co-teachers
• Teaching subjects that inspire me
• Always opportunity to gain expertise
• Scheduled time off, summer vacation
• Exposure to the outdoors, not confined 
• Dress up, wear nice things
• Decorating a classroom
• Time moves quickly
• Introduce children to wonders in history, science, books, etc. That excited look when they learn something interesting.

Teaching: Cons

• Constant scrutiny
• Criticism
• Weight of responsibility
• Enforce rules, discipline
• Never done at work, work follows me home
• Difficult situations with students or parents
• Not financially compensated on the same level as effort put in
• Poor work/life balance

Pharmacy: Pros

• Work can be left at work
• Steady income, affordable health insurance
• Challenging
• Being a part of the medical field
• Time to read, write, do puzzle, and other hobbies
• Work/life balance
• Feel appreciated, valuable as an employee 

Pharmacy: Cons

• Little involvement with church people
• No routine schedule 
• Mandatory weekends, evenings, nights, holidays
• Rules, regulations, policies
• No exposure to the outdoors - work in a confined area
• Difficult co-workers, managers

I'm pretty certain I know what the "safe harbor" is and what makes the most financial sense by considering these points. Is work/life balance more important than being involved with my church family? I know there will never be a "perfect" job and every situation has advantages and disadvantages. I can accept my present job and it's not like I have to make a decision between the two. So unless some other door opens, I'll keep plugging away!