morning musings

Being quarantined from work for three weeks has been wonderful and stressful. Although I was aware of this before, I'm even more conscious of the fact that my job has a huge impact on my life. You only have to look at this blog to see that. When I work full-time, I don't write nearly as often, and the theme is mostly work. In the last three weeks, I've written more frequently and the content has changed. I even feel different! My creative side has time to bloom, and my mind is filled with writing ideas, future goals, and dreams. Having time to walk most days helps my mood, and housework isn't so frustrating since I can keep up with it better. I've had time for some wonderful one-on-one chats with friends. My life feels enriched. Working saps my energy, and sometimes it seems the best part of my self goes to my job. I've found myself dreaming of ways to combine my love for home, reading, and writing into an occupation, but a reality check soon brings me back to earth.

On the other side, I've also realized work is good for me. It gives me a purpose. In the last few months, a short quote has impressed me. I'd heard it so often that it almost had no meaning, but one day it really struck me. "Be the best of whatever you are." Be the best pharmacy technician, if that's your job. Be the best teacher, if that's the place you fill. Be the best stay-at-home mom, if that's your calling in life. That quote is part of a longer poem by Douglas Malloch.

If you can't be a pine on the top of the hill

Be a scrub in the valley - but be

The best little scrub by the side of the rill;

Be a bush if you can't be a tree.

If you can't be a bush be a bit of the grass,

And some highway happier make;

If you can't be a muskie then just be a bass -

But the liveliest bass in the lake!

We can't all be captains, we've got to be crew,

There's something for all of us here.

There's big work to do, and there's lesser to do,

And the task you must do is the near.

If you can't be a highway then just be a trail,

If you can't be the sun be a star;

It isn't by size that you win or you fail -

Be the best of whatever you are!

I think I've just found the content for my April goal - memorize something. 

On another note, it's time for a confession. I've mentioned before that I sometimes question having this blog - it seems selfish and it's brought me reproof, among other things. Being an introvert, trying to make small talk terrifies me and I express myself much better in writing. Putting my thoughts out there has felt risky at times, but usually ends up being rewarding. If I'm going to honestly measure the encouragement I've received against the criticism, encouragement outweighs criticism by far. I don't want to turn away reproof or criticism by saying that, though. I value and will consider it as well. 

With that in mind, I want to say one more thing. As someone who has always loved reading, I want others to know the pleasure a good book can give. Everyone has their own taste when it comes to books, and what I recommend may not be your style, or go against your convictions regarding reading material. The books I read often contain language and/or actions that would not be right for a Christian. When I read those things, I know they're wrong and don't spend a lot of time thinking about it. I might even forget there is such a thing in that book and recommend it to someone else. To me, the good outweighs the bad. Please use your own judgment in deciding whether a book I've mentioned is appropriate for you or your children.