words from wendy's world
created as a way of keeping in touch with family and friends and to share my thoughts with anyone who might be interested!
December 21, 2023
winter solstice
September 28, 2023
September Joys
August 31, 2023
long live summer
June 24, 2023
the best of days
A Treasure
March 13, 2023
Going against the flow
An article popped up in my news feed a few days ago about the "de-influencer" movement and it made my day. It's high time for less of the "clothing haul" and "home makeover" influencers who've built an entire brand on consumption.
Full disclosure: At times I have fallen prey to trends and products pushed by a promoter.
In the last while though, my interests have leaned towards minimalism. It feels good to buy less, make do with what I have, and get rid of things I don't use. Recently I read a book that inspired me even more.
The Year of Less is Cait Flanders' month by month account of how she lived a year on 51% of her income, ridding herself of 75% of her belongings in the process. She allowed herself to shop for groceries and kitchen supplies, cosmetics and toiletries only when she ran out, cleaning products, gifts for others, and items on her approved shopping list. The approved shopping list consisted of several items of clothing she legitimately needed, such as boots and a sweatshirt. It also allowed for replacing items that wore out. She was NOT permitted to buy take-out coffee, clothes, shoes, accessories, books, household items, and electronics. Cait describes how she once accumulated $30,000 of consumer debt by overspending. In her year of less she sorted through all her possessions room by room and donated or got rid of most of her clothing, books, and other belongings. She faced some challenging times in her year-long experiment, but ultimately it taught her what she valued most: her family and friends. She also found the courage to switch to a job that paid less but was more satisfying, because she proved to herself she didn't need more money to have a fulfilling life.
Now that is a lifestyle worth promoting.
March 5, 2023
Remembering Grandma
We laid our dear grandma to rest yesterday under the warm Mississippi sun. Even though many tears were shed, I think we all enjoyed remembering her life and being together as a family. She left a legacy behind.
As one of the cousins said, if grandma had been there, she would've looked much the same. Even in death there was a little smile on her face, which the undertaker told us was completely natural and nothing they did. Grandma was vocal about the kind of songs she enjoyed and was especially partial to men's voices. She liked the kind of music you could tap your foot to, and many of her favorites were sung. I'm quite sure she would've been happy with the music at her funeral. The oldest grandson from each family served as a pallbearer, and they requested the opportunity to carry grandma to her final resting place instead of wheeling her most of the way. When the graveside service was over, it seemed we were all reluctant to leave her behind and the family remained as her body was lowered into the ground beside grandpa. It was a lovely spring day in the South, and it felt peaceful to leave her resting under the sunshine.
There were some recurring themes brought in the memories. Grandma was a praying mother and grandma, and her descendants witnessed her praying for them. My own memory of that is the times grandma came over for supper and dad would ask her to pray before the meal. She enjoyed praying out loud, and I remember her making comments to the effect that if she were a man, she would've liked being a preacher. She had a ready giggle and enjoyed a hearty laugh. We grandchildren remember riding in her light blue Toyota Corolla or green Chevy Cavalier; she loved to cruise and pass trucks on the highway. She took quite a few of her grandchildren on road trips whenever she visited her family in other states. Her trademark cuisine was good old-fashioned Dutch food and lots of it. The mashed potatoes and noodles swam in browned butter. She also had some unique tastes in food. Grandma liked hunting and fishing and talked about the various creatures she'd cook up in her younger (and older) days. But she loved animals as well, always owning a pug or parakeet in my memory. In her Oakwood days, she made a pet out of a chicken and was resident dog Oakley's #1 fan. Immensely interested in who her grandchildren would marry, she thought she had a knack for pairing them up.
It was a blessing to see most of Grandma's descendants gathered to remember her. She passed down some of her endearing traits and will live on in all of us!
February 28, 2023
The Most Important Thing
There's a jumble of thoughts in my head that I'm trying to come to peace with, and writing usually helps straighten them out. This is mostly an outlet for me, and if it doesn't interest you, I completely understand. If reading this feels like a waste of your time, please go do something worthwhile like hugging your child or calling your grandma instead.
My dear, spunky Grandma Swarey is no longer with us, and it feels like part of my life is over. It's not only her passing that makes me feel that way; rather, it's a combination of milestones and events. I think I now understand why midlife crisis is a thing. It's completely frightening to one day do the math and figure out that something you are thinking of happened 20 years ago and you've been married almost as long as you were single. There's a Grandma-shaped piece of your childhood that is gone forever. You've been realizing lately that things you once thought exciting barely raise a flicker of interest anymore. The happy expectations as a child and youth have faded into a routine of work, a schedule, and responsibilities. And horrors! When my parents were the age I am now I thought they had it all figured out!
It's made me realize that what I have right now will be gone someday too, and I want to grab it fiercely and enjoy each moment. I've come to this realization gradually, but I'm now fully convinced that other than a relationship with God, there is NOTHING in life more important than those who are dearest. With that uppermost, it's easy to see when something comes in the way and I need to make a change or cut back. Maybe I don't actually need more money or an exciting, fulfilling job. What I actually want is the flexibility to take a day off on the spur of the moment, and to be there when the family is together. It's about wanting less and understanding I already have everything I need.
February 2, 2023
Recap: January
December 29, 2022
Goals and Gratitude
I decided to begin with some fun reading-related challenges, and started a list that I hope to add more to. When I searched reading challenges, there were so many cheesy ones, like "read a book with a color in the title." I'm looking for more of an actual challenge! This is what I'm planning on doing so far.
1. Read a book that challenges you. I chose Crime and Punishment since it was already on my TBR.
2. Read a book published the year you were born.
3. Read a book you started but didn't finish. The Indifferent Stars Above is my choice.
My goal for this week was to finish this puzzle that has been languishing for weeks.
It's one of the harder ones I've done because of the pieces not fitting together well, making it very easy to get them in the wrong place. The border is almost all the same pattern and wasn't put together right. But I'm happy to say it's finished! I don't usually save puzzles, but this one is beautiful enough (and I don't want to do it again!) so I framed it. It looks great on the basement wall.
One of my goals for 2022 that I had success in was exercise. When I look at my stats from MapMyWalk, I've increased my walking distance by almost 50% from 2 years ago! I'm still astonished and slightly bewildered. Can I finally say I've conquered after years of trying?? I'm almost hesitant to think that, for fear of jinxing my success. But I know my mindset has changed to where exercise ranks near the top of what absolutely has to get done in a day. I don't do it every day, but 4 - 5 days a week feels realistic and attainable.
The 4:8 Principle taught that there's plenty of negative about ourselves that we could think or talk about, but why would we do that? Why give that so much space when you could instead focus on the good? So with that, I'm not going to mention the goals I didn't meet.
Awhile ago I was especially struck with the thought of how incredibly blessed I am. Sometimes I can't see it so clearly because of a stressful day at work, or not enough sleep, a headache, or a dirty kitchen. Writing thankful lists can even become routine. But at that moment it seemed crystal clear how much I've been given. From the big things, like health, family that loves each other, a comfortable home, and an income; to the little things, like a cup of hot tea. Scented candles. Books. And So. Much. Good. Food.
Goals are important, but I also want to remember how much I've already been given. There's sure to be blessings and disappointment in the new year, what will I focus on?
December 15, 2022
2022 in books
December 12, 2022
Weekly Journal Volume 7
Monday December 5
Got up and worked at my desk for awhile before school. A typical day there, after which I went to pick up new spectacles, fill the car with gas, and do grocery pickup. Started chicken enchiladas and rice as soon as I got home and listened to The Vanderbeekers of 141st Street while cooking. I'm on a roll with Christmas-themed reading right now! Guess that's my way of celebrating the season. Could've/should've worked for Gehman Accounting again this evening, but going to bed early to read for awhile had a stronger pull.
Tuesday December 6
A miserable rainy day. This kind of weather makes it easier to be content at my desk though. Started the day off with a bike ride, followed by a long cool-down period of browsing the internet, wordle, and reading devotionals on my phone. Savored my morning cup of Earl Gray while driving to New Holland, listening to When Breath Becomes Air. Wow. This is proving to be a 5 star book, not to mention stoking my medical interests! Had to switch gears to the business world and face the usual Tuesday bookkeeping jobs. Team meeting today included accounting jokes/puns. "What do you call a liability without any friends?" A loan. (Get it? Alone 😄) was my favorite. I even managed to answer "What do you call really tall expenses?" (overhead) A bit of light-heartedness was good for the brain. Didn't leave work until after 6, then pulled in for another Walmart pickup to make up for all the things my local store didn't have. Grabbed a bite from Taco Bell and drove home in the rainy dark. Cliff was already gone, working on Business Bulletin. Ended the day with Sleepytime tea and a bath.
Wednesday December 7
Stayed in bed a little longer than usual, didn't have anywhere to be today. Put a meaty ham bone and navy beans in the crockpot to make soup with another evening this week. Started work around 9:00 and kept at it until a little after 1:00, then sampled the ham & beans for lunch. Yum. Wanted to go on a walk and thought maybe the fog had lifted enough by 2:00 to go for it. I got a little way down the road and realized it was still low visibility so turned back and rode the bike inside instead. It was truly a gloomy day - very overcast and foggy. SaraBeth and the kidders came after school to cut greenery from the woods, fun to be with them for a bit. The weather felt just perfect for napping, so I laid down for awhile and may have dozed a few minutes, but felt guilty because I knew I should be working! Put in a little more time at my desk before going to Phillip and Nancy's for a delicious soup supper with the teachers, Uncle Wade's, and Jaden & Tina.
Thursday December 8
Didn't have the energy for both work and exercise before heading to school but decided exercise was more important than work. Good choice. Started packing up my stuff at school - I have to move into the music room so kindergarten can have my room. We are running out of classrooms! There has been lots of sickness going around school this week, with 14 students missing today. Cliff has had some type of cold ever since conference, but I've stayed well so far. Not sure if it's just luck or the flu shot. Left directly after school to put time in for Gehman. Worked most of the evening and Cliff had men's meeting. School is canceled for tomorrow to give everyone a chance to get better and hopefully contain the germs. I'm imagining all kinds of things I could do tomorrow instead. We'll see what happens!
Friday December 9
I must have been too excited about an extra day off, didn't even sleep late! Had plenty of time for Earl Gray and The 4:8 Principle, which really is as good as I was told. It's been very enlightening and encouraging. Knew I wanted to finish moving the stuff out of my classroom today so did that first thing before other things got in the way. Logged in to work for a little over an hour, then decided to take a deep dive into our finances and budget. As I suspicioned, expenses were greater than income. I want to get back on track with Budget Bootcamp and that involves spreadsheets and detailed recording, so I ended up working on that for several hours. Was ready for a walk and fresh air after all the number crunching. Today was wonderfully sunny and slightly chill. It was right in that zone where a coat is almost too much if you're exerting. I knew I was close to reaching 500 miles walked in 2022 and thought today's walk would get me there. When I checked afterward, I was rather annoyed to see I only needed 0.2 miles to make it! Started on supper while listening to Ben-Hur. Not sure why I've never read it before. It took me a little to get into it but now it's getting more interesting. Cooked up a huge kettle of ham and bean soup that turned out very tasty! Also made a batch of sugar cookies. Cliff took soup and cookies to the neighbors and stayed a while. I believe I was in the kitchen for 4 hours and that's more than enough for me!
Saturday December 10
Today was the long-awaited day for Dad to knock out walls in our existing kitchen/living area. Cliff did a wonderful job putting plastic up to seal off the demolition area, which confined me to the back part of the house. The only way I could get to the kitchen was to go out through the basement and in the house through the back door. We'd prepared several weeks ago by moving most of the furniture to the basement and boxing up books and kitchen supplies. I was happy to be forced into (noisy) solitude and prepared by packing a few snacks and grabbing my tea before the action started. How grand to have another leisurely morning of devotions and reading without having to be somewhere or doing something! On the list for today along with weekly wash was to put away the stuff I'd brought home from school, clean 2 pairs of boots, and finish my budget project. I was successful in that, but of course there was more on the list I didn't have time for. In between tasks I warmed up soup for lunch and went on a walk. It's astonishing how much more space the demo opened up! I'm also getting a new, bigger closet in what was wasted space above the basement stairs. A HUGE improvement even though we're still in the mess of it all. Cliff cleaned everything up very nicely and I quickly washed the kitchen floor before going to Charles's for burgers and fries with the family to celebrate his birthday. Scrumptious and fun, except I was really tired and ready to leave early.
Sunday December 11
Got up early since we planned to go with folks and Derek's to NYC for Papa Tim and Mama Anne's farewell. Mom brought along food for lunch and supper and Charles's loaned their van so we could travel together. We arrived in the city just in time for church. It was a full house today with Poughkeepsie people, new houseparents Randy & Rachel Litwiller along with their daughter Christine and Shane, and Mifflinburg teachers with Ben & Sundaymar. Sunday school was spicy with several visiting ladies and different cultures! It's good to have something different than proper Mennonite church once in awhile. The service lasted awhile with all the testimonies and tears for Tim's and welcome for Randy's. We socialized most of the afternoon before deciding to walk downtown and see Christmas lights. It was raining and cold, but we had umbrellas and enjoyed the dark, rainy city and all the colorful lights and shop windows. We watched a short light show at Saks Fifth Avenue and looped through St. Patrick's cathedral and Bryant Park. Back to the unit house for supper and final farewells with Tim's. They are such wonderful, welcoming people and were fantastic houseparents! Felt sorry for the new houseparents. It would be quite overwhelming to take on that job in such a big, unfamiliar city, but I'm sure they'll find their place and do well. Got home just as Dec 11th ended. Bed felt incredible.